Friday, November 1, 2013
Christopher Thomas – a Desperate Attention Seeker
By Bakampa Brian Baryaguma
[Dip. Law (First Class)–LDC; Cert. Oil & Gas–Mak; LLB (Hons)–Mak; Dip. LP Candidate LDC]
Tooro’s young princess, Ms Ruth Komuntale, is an unfortunate woman. For 11 months now, she has been married to her American-born husband, Mr Christopher Thomas. Their pompous marriage has been unhappy and tumultuous. Within just about the first week of their marriage, Ugandan tabloids and social media were awash with all sorts of ugly reports of the couple’s marriage break down, for reasons such as Mr Thomas’ alleged infidelity with another woman. Mr Thomas, among other criticisms, also reportedly accused his wife of not being good enough for him. These funny reports were confirmed this week when Ms Komuntale issued a statement announcing the end of her marriage with her husband. In a dramatic turn of events, Mr Thomas issued a statement for an apology, which he signed as “The Duke of Tooro,” asking his wife, family, Tooro and Ugandans to forgive him for his mistakes. Upon close scrutiny however, one finds that the purported apology is a worthless piece of writing, only expressing Mr Thomas’ derogatory attitudes and follies – braggart, contemptuous, pretentious, cunning, chauvinistic and deceitful, to say the least – only serving to extend the author’s yearning for media/public attention. Not at all nice attributes for a supposed apology!
Mr Thomas, being an American, born and raised in a society of so much pomp and glamour that is frequently obtained from both legitimate and illegitimate controversies, but married in a conservative society like Uganda, where by and large people keep to themselves, I suspect that he is labouring under some kind of cultural shock. By marrying a princess, Ms Komuntale, the gentleman must have expected, by that alone, to instantly attain celebrity status, busking in cheap, but popular and wide public acclaim, only to find that Ugandans pay little attention to defunct monarchical nobility. To his surprise, he discovered that Ugandans are not as stupid as he thought because for us, our heroes are those who contribute meaningfully to our development and general happiness, for example our gallant entertainers and sportsmen. To his shock, he soon disappeared from the limelight as fast as he had come. As we speak now, Mr Thomas must be a disappointed and disgruntled man. He is a desperate attention seeker aspiring to rise to fame and prominence, by raising unnecessary controversy, through publicly disgracing his wife; forgetting that Africans attach great respect to marriage, which explains the current media and public boomerang that is now forcing him to swallow his own vomit!
However, let me attempt to be the devil’s advocate, for once. If at all Mr Thomas’ crappy apology is genuine and indeed comes from the bottom of his heart, then Ms Komuntale will be obliged to accept it, welcome and embrace him warmly and move on happily thereafter because of all the men in the world, that is her chosen man, whom she swore, at marriage, to love and protect, for better for worse.
Then, of course, I hope that Ms Komuntale and Mr Thomas are not colluding to take Ugandans for a ride, by the latter voluntarily giving himself up for public roasting and condemnation, only for the former to pull off a stunt that is comparable to former US First Lady Hilary Clinton’s move of excusing her husband President Bill Clinton’s adulterous behaviour with, a White House aide, Ms Monica Lewinsky, which projected her as being an understanding, forgiving and compassionate wife. Could Ms Komuntale and Mr Thomas be trying to pull this one off to attract public approval and praise? I am not sure. In the event that it is true, then the two love birds will have to swallow their fatty and juicy looking red hot stone or better still, ride their tiger. If they are chocked or eaten up by them, that will be up to the two lovers to sort out and pay for – perhaps with their consciences or creator.
Meanwhile, I would advise Mr Thomas to find something more useful to do, if he is to be assured of the wide attention and publicity that he is dying to get. The self-acclaimed “Duke of Tooro,” with the assistance of the kingdom, should devise worthy and helpful programmes to engage in especially, in the area of charities, in order to contribute positively to the betterment of mankind, instead of wasting valuable resources and his energy in a useless and despicable manner, that not only insults his family, but Ugandans as a whole. He should be mindful of the legacy he hopes to leave in this world.